


You Can't Plant Seeds Underwater (Because they'll Drown, Dumbass)

by mosskid



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom
Genre: 5 seconds so f, Alternate Universe - Dream Team SMP Setting (Video Blogging RPF), Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Because I project onto Ranboo and Tubbo too much, Bittersweet, Bittersweet Ending, Caring Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Character Death, Creeper Hybrid Sam | Awesamdude, Dream SMP OC, Dream SMP Self Insert, Dream Team SMP Angst (Video Blogging RPF), Dream Team SMP OC, Dream Team SMP Self Insert, Dream Team SMP Spoilers, Enderman Hybrid Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), Evil Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Gen, Ghost Wilbur Soot, Ghostbur is there for like, Goat Hybrid Toby Smith | Tubbo, Heavy Angst, Hurt No Comfort, I put my OC in here, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Lonely Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), Manipulative Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Alexis | Quackity, Mentioned Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Eret (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Floris | Fundy, Mentioned GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Ghost Wilbur Soot, Mentioned Jschlatt (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Niki | Nihachu, Mentioned Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Sam | Awesamdude, Mentioned Technoblade, Mentioned Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Wilbur Soot, Moobloom Hybrid Toby Smith | Tubbo, Moobloom Toby Smith | Tubbo, No Romance, No Smut, OC, Older Sibling Wilbur Soot, Parent Sam | Awesamdude, Post-Manberg-Pogtopia War on Dream Team SMP (Video Blogging RPF), Protective Sam | Awesamdude, Ram Hybrid Toby Smith | Tubbo, Ranboo Angst (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo Has Panic Attacks (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo Has a Tail (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo Needs a Hug (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo in water oh no, Ranboo-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Sad Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), Self Insert, So I'll just project on my oc, Technoblade Hears Voices (Video Blogging RPF), Temporary Character Death, Toby Smith | Tubbo Angst, Toby Smith | Tubbo and Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, Villain Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot Angst, because why not, no beta we die like tommy's first two lives, they need a break
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-11
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-17 20:19:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29356335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mosskid/pseuds/mosskid
Summary: (I'm bad at summaries so bear with me)Whoops, I added another minor to the list of people for Dream to manipulate in the form of my self insert!Also, Ranboo angst, so much Ranboo angst Jesus. I just-HGNNNN I project onto the 9'5'' lanky man so hard that I had to have some Ranboo angst in here. It's a crime if I don't.Why are Dream SMP self inserts/OCs so taboo? I feel like so many people have them, but nobody talks about them. So at the moment I'm sitting here hoping I don't get called out for this.Read notes for information! :D
Comments: 10
Kudos: 34





	1. Spawn

**Author's Note:**

> HiHi! I'm just putting some notes about my self insert because pog, why not.
> 
> IGN: chiaseeds_  
> Nickname: Chia  
> I use she/they pronouns for her!  
> Species: 70% human, 25% blaze, 5% frog (because why not?)  
> She has no relations to anyone beforehand so she just vibes.  
> Of course she's going to interact with Ranboo a lot because hyperfixation go Brrrr.  
> The first chapter is mostly an intro to Chia!
> 
> I make my OC interact with a bunch of people. If you ship her with anyone I'm taking your knees.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (I'm bad at summaries so bear with me)  
> Whoops, I added another minor to the list of people for Dream to manipulate in the form of my self insert!  
> Also, Ranboo angst, so much Ranboo angst Jesus. I just-  
> HGNNNN I project onto the 9'5'' lanky man so hard that I had to have some Ranboo angst in here. It's a crime if I don't.
> 
> Why are Dream SMP self inserts/OCs so taboo? I feel like so many people have them, but nobody talks about them. So at the moment I'm sitting here hoping I don't get called out for this.  
> Read notes for information! :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HiHi! I'm just putting some notes about my self insert because pog, why not.  
> (Also, I'll be the first one to say it, this first chapter isn't very good so bear with me, I suck at exposition)  
> IGN: chiaseeds_  
> Nickname: Chia  
> I use she/they pronouns for her!  
> Species: 70% human, 25% blaze, 5% frog (because why not?)  
> She has no relations to anyone beforehand so she just vibes.  
> Of course she's going to interact with Ranboo a lot because hyperfixation go Brrrr.  
> The first chapter is mostly an intro to Chia!
> 
> I make my OC interact with a bunch of people. If you ship her with anyone I'm taking your knees.

One second, she was gone, and the next she was on the ground, the lush grass acting as a cushion as her knees gave out from the sudden spawn. The panic that filled her body subsided quickly as her palms laid onto the cool green strands of life. “Huh? Did it…” the girl’s face lit up, her warm amber eyes glowing in excitement.

Chia’s excitement didn’t stem from the fact she had been invited to the wonderful world that surrounded her, but rather, it stemmed from the fact she could even enter it in the first place. Her interactions with anything technological were the virtual equivalent to a toddler trying to force a square peg into a circle hole. She couldn’t seem to get it right, consistently. So the fact that Chia could enter the Dream SMP on a first attempt, without using the wrong IP or misspelling a character came as a shock. And that shock overpowered the joy she felt for being invited in the first place.

Chia paused, attempting to take in her surroundings. It was warm, the sunshine delicately cupping the young woman’s face as she smiled at the comfort the light provided. It was calming, something the curious Chia didn’t expect from the world she had entered, given the violent tales she had heard about it. 

"Wars scattered the lands, nobody was or is safe."

"A masked marionette puppets those below him, freedom is questionable there."

"You won’t be safe there."

Of course, Chia accepted the rumors with a heavy grain of salt. She viewed this new world as an opportunity rather than a danger, and at that given moment, the hybrid refused to change her mindset. 

Chia pushed her palms against the ground and heaved herself up, brushing the dirt and grime off her oversized cardigan that sat over her green and black striped shirt. Her eyes glanced upwards as she acknowledged the large forest that surrounded her. Chia’s body began moving without thought, a light breeze dancing around her body as she moved across the forest, looking for a build of any form. Looking for people, for interaction, for a welcome to the strange world she dropped herself into. 

What she didn’t expect was to find it so quickly.

She expected to find people scattered, a small town of a person or two sprinkled across the SMP. Chia didn’t think that the first town she would stumble across would be so big… or so destroyed. 

Chia stumbled to a stop as a large crater entered her vision, initiating her eyes to widen violently. “Christ,” she mumbled quietly, only for a new voice to respond to her.

“Yeah, it’s huge. Just… don’t fall in? I don’t know what the big deal with the egg is, but it’s not good.”

Chia whipped herself around to face the voice, only to meet someone’s suit. Despite the girl being 5’9’’ and considered generally tall, she had to jolt her head upwards at nearly a 90 degree angle to meet the face of the person who spoke to her. 

The young man covered head to toe in black and white aesthetic towered over her by at least 3 feet or so. Chia’s jaw dropped, to say the least. “God, what…” she mumbled trying her best to be polite and make eye contact, despite how difficult it is. 

The mystery man chuckled awkwardly, avoiding her gaze, “Yeah, I get that a lot.”

“Oh- God, sorry, that came off as rude, didn’t it?”

“No, it’s fine, really. Endermen things.”

“Huh? Endermen? Are you- OH GOD,” Chia quickly forced her gaze away from his eyes and towards one of his pointed ears, as to not agitate him, “Man, I’m on a streak, aren’t I? Hopefully that didn’t bother you too much,”

“Oh, yeah, I’m good! But thanks for the thought, seriously.”

The man crouched down with his hand out, “Ranboo.”

“Ah, Chiaseeds, but call me Chia,” she said, awkwardly eyeing his hand before high-fiving it with an awkward laugh. 

Ranboo stared at his hand in confusion for a moment before allowing a snort to leave his mouth, “Man, that’s a first.”

“Heh, yeah, I’m bad with these sorts of things, I suppose.”

“I feel you.”

An awkward silence ensued as Chia eyed the crater, and her eye caught sight of the red mass in the center of the hole. “And… that is the egg you mentioned, I assume?”

A light mumble in approval left Ranboo’s mouth. “Yeah, my only advice is not to get involved in it. It gives bad vibes, y’know?”

Chia nodded solemnly, “Hard to disagree with you there.”

More awkward silence as the two hybrids struggled to start a conversation. 

“Uhm, I’m going to build a shack or something until I can relocate into some form of a society, I suppose,” Chia stammered, struggling to force her voice to sound natural rather than clunky and peculiar. 

Ranboo pressed his lips together and nodded, his slightly clawed hand scratching the back of his neck. “If you need a place to stay in a few days, let me know, I can try to give you some suggestions? Also, do you want a tour or…?”

“Oh, no… no I’m good honestly. I don’t need one, really. I’d rather try my best to figure it out on my own. Not sure why, but I’m trying to be independent in my life for once, you know?”

That was a blatant lie. Chia just realized how clunky this conversation was and didn’t want to force Ranboo to continue the socialization if he didn’t need to. She didn’t want to have her first impression to be, “Socially awkward co-dependent kid,” after all.

“You sure?”

“Yeah!”

“Okay then… just… whisper at me if you need something, I guess?”

Chia nodded with a light smile. “I will, thank you. Really, thanks.”

“Anytime, welcome to the SMP,” Ranboo said with a smile in return, before rolling up his sleeve to view his communicator. 

The endermen mumbled something into the device, but all Chia could pick up was, “Stasis,” “Phil,” and, “Pearl,” before Ranboo had seemingly teleported away, leaving her alone.

Chia exhaled, exhausted, before clamping her hands together in slight annoyance. “Well, time to build a shack, I suppose.”


	2. In the Netherrack Walls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some world building, I suppose

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't be weird-  
> Chia is a minor, I am a minor, don't be a creep, use common sense or else I'll take your knees

A C H I E V E M E N T  
chiaseeds_ has achieved [We Need to go Deeper]

Chia didn't hesitate for a moment when considering where her temporary home should be. The Nether easily checked all the boxes for the ideal living space. It was warm, no water, and the boiling-hot netherrack was comforting under her feet. The light tingle of a slight burning sensation on the girl's soles send a wave of relaxation over her. It felt peculiarly releasing, like entered a cooled room after staying in the sun for far too long (but reversed, in a sense).

Her inventory was filled to the brim with a variety of wood logs and a few worn down stone tools with fresh iron ones buried beneath them. A few light sheets of woolen carpet were stuffed at the bottom of the jumble of items, the white sheet almost acting as a pillow for her inventory. 

Chia's fragile hands pushed the mess around, and eventually the hybrid managed to grip around a iron pickaxe. She looked at the tool, satisfied with the effort she had put in to create the item, and subsequently began swinging at a small netherrack mound, forming a cave on the inside. Netherrack was easy to break, but held its form well if not tampered with vigorously. 

Perfect for a short term home.

Netherrack's low strength against Chia's pickaxe allowed for the formation to be completely in a surprisingly swift manner, as she managed to finish the now seemingly menial task in a matter of minutes. A smile formed in Chia's mouth as she backed away from the tunnel she had made for herself. A smooth floor of netherrack sat beneath an arced roof of the same material, forming a simplistic (and slightly uneven) dome. She slowly nodded, as if to say to herself, 'Yeah, I'm sure this'll work for now.'

Opening her inventory once more, Chia's tan hands moved to the bottom of the storage to retrieve the woolen carpet at the bottom. The soft material was as white and as puffy as the clouds in the sky. She kneeled down and slowly began placing the material gently against the scalding hot netherrack, the carpet somehow managing to not burn at the places where the cool wool and the heated flooring touched. 

And in a short period of time, the young hybrid's first task was done. The work wasn't nearly as tedious as Chia expected it to be, her amber eyes scanning the floor to see if she had missed and area when placing the carpet, as she immediately felt the job was done far too quickly. Yet, she didn't complain when the realization came that the job was simpler than she thought it would be. 

After that point, it didn't take long for the young woman's small hole in the wall to become a home, spruce fences guarding the entrance with a dark oak fence evenly in the middle. Despite the lack of a bed, the small home had everything Chia needed for the moment. Food was cooking in the smoker, iron in the blast furnace, and a painting of what seemed to be a landscape sat neatly in the middle of the room, right above the crafting table and other appliances. 

It wasn't perfect by any means, the ceiling was uneven in a few spots, and the entrance to her cave did little to protect her from Ghasts and other mobs, but it was a home. And for the time being, that was enough to keep Chia content. 

Her hands reached into the furnace to grab a baked potato that had just been cooked. She had found the potatoes whilst exploring the crater that was apparently L'Manburg. They were inside a floating barrel, seemingly a survivor of whatever chaos ensued in the area she saw before her. 

Despite her exploration, Chia did take what Ranboo said to heart, and avoided the egg at all costs. Even if it meant she had to take a long walk across the border of the gigantic hole, it was a safety measure she was willing to take. 

It did puzzle her though, that a single barrel managed to survive the incident, but it benefited her nonetheless, so Chia pushed the curious thought away, her hands flapping in the air as if the question was physically nearby. 

The crackling of the fire and the bubbling of the lava sent Chia into a peaceful, content trace of sleepiness. It felt like home, despite her not being born in or nearby the nether. Her eyes fluttered shut softly as the young woman curled up onto the soft carpet. It wasn't a bed, but it'd do. 

She couldn't sleep, of course, that was impossible, but she could lay down and allow her body to relax, and give her eyes an opportunity to take a break from the violent brightness of the Nether. And although her brain still moved a mile per minute, wondering curiously about why Chia had chosen to live in such a place, or what adventures or interactions she would experience, the grogginess of her tired body managed to block out those thoughts, creating the temporary illusion of rest.


	3. The First One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chia makes a friend! :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chia interacts with Tubbo in this chapter, so I'll say it now :D  
> My Female OC interacting with a male character is not basis for shipping and never will be. Please don't ship Chia with any of the canon DSMP. I'm not comfy with it, and I have basis to believe most of the DSMP isn't as well.
> 
> Also short chapter POGGG

A light nudge brought Chia’s awareness back from the sleep-like trance she had found herself in. Her amber eyes fluttered open to see who, or what was trying to get her attention.

The hybrid wasn’t sure what to expect, but the small boy in a light green cardigan managed to surprise her. Chia jumped back, lightly bonking her head onto the lower part of her netherrack ceiling. “Flipping- God, are you- man, I’m sorry,” she looked into the eyes of a small boy with ram horns and wide blue eyes, flooded with wonder.

They just stood there for a moment, neither of the two speaking as both stared at each other, until the horned boy snapped out of it and shook his head violently before jolting his hand out to shake. “I’m sorry to… wake? You? I’m not quite sure how… what? Uh- anyways! I’m Tubbo! I saw you joined earlier yesterday and just saw you laying here when I was heading to the nether hub.”

Chia nodded, a smile forming onto her face as she improved her posture and shook Tubbo’s hand (she learned from her mistakes with Ranboo) before moving her hand back to scratch her neck. Her heated hands left Tubbo’s hands surprisingly warm, even stinging for a brief moment. “Why are you sleeping in here? Isn’t it easier to… actually sleep… in the overworld?”

“Eh, it’s cold.”

“Cold? It’s easily upwards of 70 fahrenheit most of the time when you’re in the plains! Taiga and Tundra are different, but you know?”

“Warmth is subjective, dumbass. I feel content in here.”

“What are you, a blaze?”

Chia paused, staring at Tubbo deadpan before bursting out laughing. Tears formed in her eyes from the laughter as she bellowed in joy, only for her laughter to cut out as the tears fell down her cheeks. The water gave a burning sensation from it’s chill, the tear much colder than her body temperature. She managed to suppress a wince, as she didn’t want to startle the boy standing tense in front of her. A chuckle left her mouth once more. 

“Quite literally, yes.”

A pause.

“Distant relative is… uh…”

“One of your ancestors CANONICALLY HAD SEX WITH A BLAZE?”

A laugh was drawn out of Chia’s mouth once more, but this time Tubbo followed suit. Chia snickered between chuckled, “Y...yeah. Don’t ask how, I don’t know either.”  
Chia smiled to herself as Tubbo laughed violently at her response, satisfied with the fact that she had made her first friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fear Chapter 6!   
> The first 5 chapters will be intro to Chia, but past that I might consider trying to add your guys' OCs!!!! I'll put information whenever I get to chapter 6, so keep your ideas on the ready >:D

**Author's Note:**

> No clue where this is going.  
> This chapter was trash but we won't talk about that.


End file.
